Someone brought up the topic of children and fasting online and someone responded with great advice from Shaykh Ubaid Al-Jabiri, alhamdulillah, so I thought I would share it here as well as Ramadan draws near. In the question to the scholar below, someone asks about a woman who made her two year old fast. This brought to mind of an incident someone related to me about a woman in her home country of Morocco who had a little girl and made her fast and the girl repeatedly asked her mother for something to eat throughout the day, but the mother told her to just try to hold on a little longer, a little longer, and subhanAllah, later that day the little girl passed away as a result of the fasting.
Benefit: Chart - Who Fasting Is and Isn't Incumbent Upon
Training Children for Worship:
Al-Rubay’ bint Mu’awwidh – Allah be pleased with her – said while describing how the Prophet – Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him – told them to fast ‘Âshûrâ:
We used to make toys out of dyed wool for the children and keep them with us so if the children asked us for food we would give them the toys to distract them until they completed their fast. Sahîh Muslim. A similar narration is also in Sahîh Al-Bukhârî.
Al-Nawawî states in his commentary on Sahîh Muslim:
In this narration we are shown that children should be trained to do acts of obedience and made used to doing worship; although they are not legally bound.
Question:
Oh Shaykh, You find from the women those who make their child fast and the child is only two years of age. They use as a proof for this, that the Salaf used to make the young children fast. What are your comments upon this?
Answer by Shaykh Ubaid Al-Jabiri:
That which I am aware of from which the scholars have mentioned, is that the young child should be commanded to fast, if they are able to handle it. I believe that they intend by this the child who has reached the age of discretion (tamyeez) or those above that, those who are (approx.) 8 or 9 years of age because they are said to be able to handle it. The child is commanded with acts of worship when he reaches the age of discretion. This is as training and to get him accustomed to it so he may know the acts of worship like the prayer and fasting.
As for the woman making the child fast and they are two years of age then this is a mistake. I don’t know any example of this from the actions of the Salaf. I hope that you convey my Salaams to them. And I advise them to fear Allah as it pertains to their children. For, verily the child who is two will suffer harm from fasting and he has no intellect to allow him to be commanded. That which is reported upon the Salaf is that the child should be commanded, and the like of him, (the two year old) will not be able to comprehend a command or prohibition. Those women making their children (the like of this age) fast are committing a monstrous mistake.
I fear that if the baby was to die, due to the mother making him fast, she caused this and no doubt she is a sinner. I hold that she caused this and she has to pay blood money and “Kafarah” expiation.
Shaykh Ubaid Al-Jabiri
Related:
Lessons on Fasting for Kids- Fasting in Ramadan for Kids - lessons for kids from Authentic-Translations.com" - This article contains translations in very simple English and thus is intended for younger readers or anyone simply wanting a smooth reading article."
Teaching Kids to Fast
from “Fasting in Ramadan”
Children (who have not reached puberty) are not commanded to fast. However, they are strongly encouraged to fast even a few days so that they get used to it and they grow up knowing the worship of fasting. In fact this was the practise of the first women of lslam who were living around the Prophet, (Peace and Blessing of Allah be upon him). An example of that is Ar-Rubayya' bint Mu'awiyyah who reported that: "The Messenger of Allah, (Peace and Blessing
"Whoever has spent the morning fasting is to complete his fast.
Whoever has not spent this morning fasting should voluntary fast for the remainder of the day.' We fasted after that announcement, as did our young children, we would go to the mosque and make toys stuffed with cotton for them to play with. lf one of them started crying due to hunger, we would give them a toy to play with until it was time to eat." (Bukhari and Muslim.)
There are many ways to educate your children about Ramadan, the best and most important of which is to set a good example by fasting properly and behaving according to the Prophetic teachings. This is what your children will take from you first. When you are fulfilling this you can very easily [and they will accept it and practise it easily as well] teach them what you want. Here are a few guidelines that you can use with your children [you can think of others as well]:
1. Depending on their age encourage them to fast a number of days up to every other day or more for those who are almost at the age of puberty. For those who are still young let them fast a day or two.
2. Take your children to the Masjid for Maghrib prayer and break the fast with the larger Muslim community to make them feel the greatness of fasting and the unity of Muslims in worshipping Allah.
3. If your children cannot fast let them eat with you at the time of Maghrib and teach them that you are breaking the fast even if they ate before.
4. Teach your children the supplication of breaking the fast.
5. Take your children to the Taraweeh prayer so that they get used it and know about it from an early age.
6. Teach them to recite the Qur'an regularly and inform them that the Prophet (Peace and Blessing of Allah be upon him) used to do that in Ramadan.
7. Correct them if they misbehave or say unacceptable words and remind them that they are fasting and this may alter their reward.
8. Wake them up for Suhoor [even if they don't fast] and Fajr prayer.
9. Teach them to feed people who are fasting and tell them about the reward for that.
10.Dress them in the best clothes, give them a bath and take them with you to the Eid Prayer. Teach them that this is our celebration.
And remember that the Prophet (Peace and Blessing if Allah be upon him) said:
"One who is given the responsibility of bringing up Daughters and treats them well will be shielded from Hell. (Bukhari and Muslim)
